We’re all living in a Change Storm and experiencing more change, more often than ever before. It’s making us sick, with anxiety, stress and burnout.
In this video, I share some of the results of my research and the secret to why some people are resilient, while others are not. Learn about the three foundations to build your mental strength and resilience, so you can weather the Change Storm and cope with anything life throws at you.
See transcript below.
Want to know more? You can find out more about the Change Storm and how to build your resilience, or read about My story.
Dealing with the Change Storm
There are science-backed activities you can do to better manage your stress and build your resiliecy. Check out my posts under the below topics for some ideas on how to manage your stress, or speak to a professional.
Community and Connection: Connecting with others and contributing to your community are proven to build emotional resiliency and make your life happier. It is so important not to neglect this part of your life, especially if it doesn’t come easily, like when work is really busy or if you’re a natural introvert.
Health and Wellbeing: Your health and wellbeing is critical to your happiness. Luckily, there is a wealth of information about how to make small changes to your life to make it healthier and improve your wellbeing.
Meaning and Purpose: Having a sense of meaning and purpose in life is critical to resiliency and living a happy life. You need it to thrive and flourish. It’s about having a reason to get out of bed in the morning, setting goals and having commitments. Some lucky people get that purpose through their job, but many of us get our purpose through other activities such as volunteering, learning or experiencing new things or caring for others.
TRANSCRIPT: Weathering the Change Storm
Now, more than any other time in human history, we’re experiencing more change, more often than ever before. It’s a change storm. And it can feel like it’s raining down on us, and there’s hailstones pelting us. And there’s that sideways rain, and it’s even raining cats and dogs… and even men.
There is no escaping change today. So why are we so bad at coping with it? Now I’m no stranger to change. I come from an elite sports background, having played volleyball for Australia and on scholarship in the states college. I started my career as a journalist working with USA Today and then moving to large multinational organizations, where I coached senior executives.
But a couple of years ago, I was on holidays with a friend when I had a motorbike accident and I nearly died. But that wasn’t the worst of it.
The worst part wasn’t being told I’d probably have to have my leg amputated.
And it wasn’t the three months in hospital, the 12 surgeries, the years of pain and rehab.
The worst part was a few months after the accident, shortly after I got home.
One day, I started crying. And I wheeled myself into my bedroom and put myself to bed and that’s where my husband found me when he got home from work that night. And that’s where I stayed crying for the next four days. It was the start of a very long journey to regain my mental health.
And when I got out of that dark space, I started talking to people who’d been through major life changes. And I went from feeling alone and confused about what I’d gone through to feeling indignant that so many people I spoke to had similar stories to mine. They had been through major change and they hadn’t coped.
So I ask you again, why are we not able to deal with this change when we all know it’s happening?
So being an ex journalist, I’ve spent the last few months talking to people around the world. I’ve spoken to Olympic athletes and their coaches, to former and current military personnel to people who’ve been made redundant and people who’ve retired, a second of people who’ve been given heartbreaking diagnoses and who’ve experienced trauma.
The great news is there are three foundations that people who cope with change well have.
Now this isn’t to say that those people don’t feel pain. When things go wrong, they still experience the stress of the situation. But they bounce back faster. And they don’t let it overwhelm them and lead them to depression. So I’m guessing you want to know what those three things are?
So firstly, they have purpose and meaning in their life. And for a lot of us, that means a job. But there is variety here. It’s what gets you out of bed in the morning. It’s having goals and commitments.
The second thing is they’ve got strong social bonds. They’ve invested time into a core group of people that they feel like can depend on. They also often have a wider community of people around them due to things like church, sports groups, and volunteering activities.
The third thing these people have is that they practice and prioritize health and wellness habits. Now the habits themselves can vary between things like yoga, practicing gratitude and mindfulness, to hardcore gym junkies or simply eating healthfully and drinking water. But they prioritize those habits in their lives over the other things that get in the way of day to day life.
Now, you’re probably wondering what happened to me and how I got myself out of that mental health hole and to be honest, it was dumb luck. Two things happened around the same time.
Being an athlete, I was getting bored with my rehab, it was going a bit too slowly. And one day I rolled into my physio, and I said I’ve just booked my flights to Machu Picchu, we’ve got a year to get me there. And last October, I did hike Machu Picchu [applause]. But that gave me a goal gave me a purpose and it lit a fire.
The second thing that happened around the same time is a good friend of mine railroaded me into coaching Sydney’s LGBTQ first ever competitive volleyball club. And what I didn’t know at the time is that those crazy, loving, fabulous men would give me back my community and my social bonds that I’d lost when I’d come home from hospital all of a sudden. And I can’t thank them enough.
So if there’s two things that I want to leave you with today, firstly, if you’re going through change, please know that you’re not alone if you’re struggling.
Secondly, you will all go through change at some point in your future. So take stock of your life. Look at those three things — workaholics in particular — make sure there is balance and you’re investing in your social bonds and the people around you and that you’re taking time to look after yourself.
Thank you
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Andrea Banicki says
This is wonderful talk. Thanks for sharing your story and what you found in your research. Cheers!
marie says
Thanks Andrea! More to come soon 😊