Mental Health in an Unequal World (E88)

Happiness for Cynics podcast

This week, Marie and Pete talk about inequality and equity and how it impacts our mental health.

Show notes

In this week’s episode, Marie and Pete talk about a great video which helps people to better understand privilege. Check it out.

Transcript

M: Welcome to happiness for cynics and thanks for joining us as we explore all the things I wish I’d known earlier in life but didn’t.  

P: This podcast is about how to live the good life. Whether we’re talking about a new study or the latest news or eastern philosophy, our show is all about discovering what makes people happy.  

M: So, if you’re like me and you want more out of life, listen in and more importantly, buy in because I guarantee if you do, the science of happiness can change your life.  

P: Plus, sometimes I think we’re kind of funny. 

[Intro music fadeout] 

P: Yeah. Hey, hey, It’s exciting. Oh, my Lord, this feels so weird. We’re back in the same room. Oh, my God. Like it’s been whole three months. I’m not saying you being able to be negative.

M: I love the way you’re saying that. That is making me think. “Oh, my God, Becky, look at her butt”

P: Yes, Romy and Michelle’s high school reunion! We’re back. We’re back together. It’s so nice to see you.

M: So nice to see you too. No one else can see us seeing each other.

P: I can see you see me. So that’s all good. It is so good. And next week. Sydney’s opening up So that’s good news for us. It’s huge news for us. We’ve been in a three month plus lockdown, our first real big one. So yes, you could feel the excitement. I’ve got clients coming through my door going, Oh my God, can you believe Monday’s coming?

M: Not only that, we’ve had beautiful spring weather. There’s just birds and it’s lovely. Yeah, absolutely.

P: So what are we talking about today?

M: Well, today we’re talking about World Mental Health Day and this is theme is mental health in an unequal world. So the 10th of October is World Mental Health Day. I wish you and your family good mental health on that day.

P: It’s wonderful that we’ve actually got a day for. I mean, there’s a day for everything these days, but a day…

M: And a month we’ve got a mental health month as well, and Australia does a different one to America and all around the world.

P: But we’re talking about mental health more, which I think is really valuable.

M: Absolutely.

P: And what I like about this one is that this particular focus on the inequality of mental health and how certain people have more access to mental health than others. And how we can redress that.

M: Well, not only that, it’s talking about inequality more broadly, so not just around mental health. It’s about how poverty, for instance, and there are a range of different groups out there who are still experiencing inequality today. And we talk about the huge progress we made in the 20th century when it comes to women’s rights, for instance. But even in the past year, we’ve seen with the #MeToo movement in America that there’s still so much that we need to do. We are still so far from having an equitable society. Um, and women’s rights is one of the most progressed. If you look at groups like people with disabilities or, um, LGBTQ rights around the world, there’s huge inequities, particularly if you look country to country. We are pretty blessed here in Australia, But even here there is still huge ingrained hatred and, uh, all the ISMs… racism, you know, homophobia, agism and all of those things that as a society we haven’t redressed.

P: We’re starting to redress them here in Australia. We’ve had a number of royal commissions lately in the last maybe decade, I would say that is redressing and bringing to light some of these issues, particularly in terms of elder care and disabled access, and people with disabilities. So it is the start of the conversation. But how does this impact on people’s access to health and to happiness?

M: Well, what we’re talking about here is a person feeling “less than,” right? So your experience as a non-binary or a transgender person, or as a woman in this world, or as a person of colour or a person with a disability is “less than” others around you… the majority. And therefore, we’ve spoken about this before, it’s looking at those around you and knowing that you have less than others because of the system you’re in, not because you’ve worked less hard or you’ve done something wrong, but the system is stacked against you. And so when you look at others around you and you find that you have less opportunity and less access to everything, including mental health resources, then your ability to be happy is impacted

P. Absolutely. How do you work against that? How do you find a way through?

M: Oh my goodness. That’s a big question isn’t it?

P: Yeah

M: look, what I love about positive psychology is that it started saying, let’s not only focus on the bad, let’s also focus on the good so that you’re painting reality. Right now, your reality is that if you are one of these people in one of these minority groups and that that minority group has historically and systemically been disadvantaged, then you are starting from behind the start line in life line, and that’s reality.

P: A wonderful video of the American coach who gets his class out on the football field. And everybody who answers yes to a question gets to take two steps forward and some kids never leave the start line [see video in show notes]. Some kids, yeah, and the kids who are at the front don’t see them. And so, at the end of this exercise, he asked the kids at the front to turn around and they look behind them and they see everybody else who are 100 metres behind them and starting from a lot further back. And they have to work all that much harder to get to the same start point. And it makes it relative that when you have privilege, how valuable that can be and the awareness of being able to go, “right, I have privilege because of the A, B, C and D. How do I address the imbalance?”

M: So that’s awareness, and that is gold. That’s really great exercise to help people understand privilege. However, if you are starting behind others, there is a reality to that. And that doesn’t mean give up.

P: No, definitely not.

M: It does mean you still have things to be thankful for, and there are still ways positive psychology can bring the good to your world. So you’ve got the things that you can’t change that are outside your sphere of influence, they are what they are. And many people have their own story, their own background, their own baggage… and some people have a lot more that they bring with them. And then there is still the hope and the inspiration that comes from people who, despite all the odds, are happy, positive, optimistic people. And that’s what the goal is.

P: You see this so much with certain cultures that have got things like generosity and gratefulness and mindfulness built into their cultural values that you see if anyone has been to Nepal. You see these people live simple lives. They live on the side of a mountain, and they are so happy and so generous, and they will give you the shirt off their back. And the joy that they emanate is because they value simplicity, um, and mindfulness and family and society. And all of these things that we know are proven to increase your mental well being and happiness subjective wellbeing levels.

M: And not only that, I think that the flip side is, you know, if you’ve been dealt a raw hand, there’s still things you can do to increase your happiness, right? We’ll pop it in the show notes that video about privilege. If you’ve been dealt a good hand, it’s still important to do all of these things that we talk about on the show because it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going to be happy. As we’ve seen before, a lot of us are stuck in the rat race. We’re trying to get more and more and more, and we’re not focusing on mindfulness getting out into nature, being grateful all of those things. But also, if you do find that you’re living a life that is privileged and I definitely am, I’ll put my hand up to say that I’ve had a lot of advantages in life. Some of the things you can do is just to become an ally.

P: Yes, do something proactive and creative reflect on the community. How do you support your community? How do you contribute to your local community?

M: Next time you hear someone say something racist or sexist or homophobic or ageist or anything like that, what are you going to do? How can you help in a polite and respectful way to bring people forward on this journey so that we end up at a point of equity at some point in the near future? Hopefully, in our lifetime!

P: It doesn’t take much. It can just be about having that conversation. And it does have to be a respectful and dignified conversation because someone who has an opinion, you’re not going to change that opinion.

M: You might be able to..

P: but that should be the goal.

M: But sometimes people say things without realising the impact it has on others, and I’ve been pulled up, and I was mortified that I used a word that I didn’t realise had such a bad impact on a certain group. And I’ve never said – well, I think I might have said it once or twice accidentally since – but I’ve made a real effort never to say it again. Never deliberately. And that’s growth and that, you know, I thank the person who pulled me up on that and had an awkward conversation is an awkward conversation. And it’s not an easy one to have.

P: When you’re um, perhaps a colleague at work or something. Someone has been a more senior position. It’s difficult to go one sec. I need to talk about this. Yeah, absolutely. But that’s how you can be a really strong ally.

M: Absolutely. And then a lot of us who work for corporate will have various days through the year. There’s wear it Purple Day that we do in my organisation to support LGBT like we wear purple T shirts, make an effort on that day to find a purple T shirt or to find a scarf, or to find a way to show that you are supporting that community because it is such a simple thing for us who are in the privileged position and in the majority to just go, “I don’t have a purple T shirt.”

P:  This is what I like about these awareness days, like I love the one about hearing impairment like you don’t we take it for granted because we can all here. But when you come across someone that has a hearing impairment, how do you communicate? How do you work with that? How do you find make someone’s life easier? Who has that hearing impairment? I’ve been getting access to a lot of that in terms of a communication course that I’m doing through my studies at the moment. And it’s made me really self-reflect on how I interact with those people who are living with disabilities and providing equal access and also being respectful enough in terms of, um, not drawing attention to it, I’m not dismissing it in my daily interactions

M: It’s also about being flexible to accommodate it

P: absolutely hugely.

M: Find a way, call someone you know who can help you communicate. Go that little bit further or the extra mile to help that person feel included and help them belong. It’s huge. Another thing you can do is simply educate yourself.

P: That’s a huge one that can be uncomfortable as well.

M: Yeah, absolutely.

P: You’re putting yourself in that receptive position. For some people, it’s really difficult because some people believe, “But I’m not racist.” I’m a running gag with a friend of mine. You know, I’m always going on about the ‘bloody Asians.’ But I totally don’t agree with that, I have to have to quantify this. So I managed a volleyball club for many years and it was predominantly Asian. And so when I walked into that club, I boxed Asian people into one big pigeon hole. And then what I realised was that there was a difference between dealing with the Thai population, dealing with the Chinese population dealing with the Malaysians, and that all these different populations have their idiosyncrasies and intricacies. That was my education, and I had to take a big kick. Step back, really look at myself. So now it’s quite interesting, but when I say “the bloody Asians” it comes from a place of love. But if someone heard me, they probably wouldn’t

M: there is probably a whole other conversation about how you probably are encouraging other people.

P: My point exactly is that I’ve got to check myself when I do those sorts of things, because I might be coming from it from a place of love. And yet I’m supporting a stereotype and the negative by making light of the situation or making it into a gag.

M: Yeah, absolutely. So there are so many great videos. I watched a great one on Trans People the other day, 15-minute video on YouTube and learned about language and gender and sexual identity versus physical, what you’re born with and what you identify as and it was just. And I am heavily involved in the LGBT community, both at work and in volleyball circles, and it was still confusing me. So, I think the thing to ask yourself is, Do I have a friend who identifies as a minority group? And if you don’t go watch a video from that person’s perspective, that can be tough for some people. I also don’t have any indigenous friends, so that’s another area where I lack firsthand experience and so it’s important to go find someone who has lived experience with being in that minority group and watch a video about their experiences.

P: That’s a very relevant I was going to say, Australian, but I’m probably getting myself into trouble there. Um, I come from a very rural community. That was where I was brought up. And there’s a lot of calls about Australia being a racist country, which I believe that fundamentally it is.

M: I think some people are. I think it’s like that with every country.

P: Exactly This is my point is I come at it from my perspective that when you’re in those pockets where that that rhetoric is prevalent, and you wonder how many people in a minority group do these people associate with? So instead of discarding someone on the street or stereotype seeing them and judging them for who they are, put yourself in an uncomfortable position and go and spend some time there…

M: Yeah, or go online today, right? That’s very easy. So, you know, not every person who is in a minority wants to be a spokesperson for that minority group. They don’t necessarily… You don’t want to go approach the gay guy at work and be like, hey, because you’re gay, can you talk to me about the gay population?

P: Isn’t your crew happy now? It’s Mardi Gras.

M: I’m sure you’ve had that a lot, right? And just as you know, I often early in my career, was asked to represent grads. And you do a lot of work when you’re helping grads. When I was in a grad position, but also women and a lot of extra hours to represent women in and I was in tech. So women in tech, I was on committees and, you know, organising events and stuff. And it’s all done on top of your day job. So be really careful not to find that one person in your organisation or your sports group or whatever and put that extra burden on them. Really, the burden should be on you, and there are great online resources that don’t put a burden on anyone. There are people who have stood up and put themselves out there to help other people understand them in their community. So I highly recommend that.

M: So I do just want to say the theme for this year’s World Mental Health Day is mental health is an unequal world, and what they’re trying to do is highlight that inequality due to race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender identity and the lack of respect for human rights in many countries, including for people living with mental health conditions and physical health conditions and all of those differences, inequality can have impacts on our happiness levels. And we saw that earlier, we spoke about it this year in the World Happiness Report that came out in March. Yes, so if you remember, we talked about how one of the major findings from this year’s World Happiness Report was that – and that looks at 157 countries and the quality of lives as they’re being lived. And the report’s assembled by the Sustainable Development Solutions Network, which is made up of economists, psychologists and public health experts around the world – and one of the main findings this year is the assessment of how inequality affects wellbeing across the various countries. So essentially, researchers have found that people are happier when they live in populations with less inequality.

P: We’ve talked about this before in terms of Ted talk that we found where a an English scholar was explaining how inequality, wealth, inequality, impacts on social inequality and people’s access and experience of happiness and feelings of belonging and contentment. Yeah, right down to the financial aspects of it.

M: So you’d find in a country like America, which has one of the highest, if not the highest, levels of income inequality, your top 1% (You can’t even wrap your head around how much they earn per hour or you can’t. And I’m not exaggerating. You can’t) versus someone who’s working 60 hours a week to put food on the table at $5 an hour and can’t afford a healthy meal. Can’t afford to feed their kids fruit and vegetables because it’s just not doable.

P: Yep, absolutely.

M: And so that’s the difference that, um, you’re seeing in America versus potentially a third… developing country. Urgh, I’m always going to go back and say, ‘Third World’ I need to stop myself… sorry, developing country that doesn’t have that income inequality because they’ve got less money overall, so that top 1% is far closer to the bottom 1%.

P: Exactly.

M: That society, even though they’re in a developing country and their access to clean water and fresh food, is just as, um poor, if not worse, because they’ve got less inequality within their society. It impacts less on their happiness.

P: Absolutely, and the science proves it if you can, if you can value those elements of human connection, sometimes that leads to better contentment

M: and stop comparing yourself to others. We’ve talked about social media as well, and how this is exacerbating that need to compare to people around you. And, you know, if you had a plan to get married and have kids by 30 and all your friends have and you still haven’t, it’s the comparison. If your friends have bigger houses, bigger incomes, nicer cars, sexier husbands… whatever, it is we naturally compare. So it’s dropping that comparison from our self talk and how we look at our lives… which is not an easy thing to do! But again, um, when you talk about inequality and inequity, something that compounds that is constantly focusing on it.

P: Yes, bring it back to you. Bring back to your goals and your ideals and your values

M: mmmm, and the positive psychology side. What can you control and what is good in your life of control? What is good and what’s important? A lot of the times you might be thinking, How come that person has a great car?

P: I don’t

M: But really, when you sit down, do you even want a nice car?

P: Exactly. Yeah, all right.

M: But we’re done for another week. So wishing everybody out there a happy mental Health day, World Mental Health Day and I highly encourage you to go out and watch YouTube video about a minority group if you don’t have a friend or family member who has that lived experience. And work on a way that you can speak up, will become a better ally or support one of these groups so that we can continue our fight against inequality.

P: Absolutely. Get involved in the community. Find it in the community. On that note until next time. Have a happy week.

[Happy exit music – background] 

M: Thanks for joining us today if you want to hear more, please remember to subscribe and like this podcast and remember you can find us at www.marieskelton.com, where you can also send in questions or propose a topic. 

P: And if you like our little show, we would absolutely love for you to leave a comment or rating to help us out. 

M: Until next time. 

M & P: Choose happiness.  

[Exit music fadeout] 

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